sparkignitefire

My father showed me the letter he wrote to his commanding officer asking to be deployed to the Gulf War. He did not get to go.

Every time I saw my dad, it was a parade of remembering. His ability to spend a lot of time with anyone was limited.  It did not matter how far one traveled to see him, you might only get a couple of hours. Those couple of hours were on his terms.

I have said that loss is the great equalizer. It does not matter how much money, prestige, or how much loss you have suffered……it always cuts you off at the knees. Loss comes in so many forms. Just when you think that you have mastered how to react to one kind, another comes your way. When I see different cultures mourn their loss, the realization of how frigid we have become is evident.

Whenever you would visit my dad or his dad, the remembering was all over the walls and every surface. As though my father learned to wear his accomplishments as a buffer. This continued even in his death. Every moment of the funeral was planned……accounted for, and he his buried in a place where you must travel only to spend a bit with him.

Building patience, insight and acceptance with yourself and people you let into your world is……well, you can learn to do it and make an attempt not to lose your mind. Maybe for the interesting bits you find out about yourself and how you work and move through this life better.

Remember and do the best you can.